Grieving

Yesterday I took a long walk from the 70's to 14th feeling the waves of pain and sadness flow through me, sometimes taking over me, sometimes easing up, but mostly taking over.

I have been wondering who I am, feeling confused in the harsh reality and down to earth pain of death, nothing pretty about it, nothing poetic, nothing inspiring in a rushed accident.

I barely hear about the world, how others are doing, the oil spill that I read through Oriahs' blog in a post she calls "coming up for air" and I can relate to, as she grieves too.  I am not near that place where I can come up for air, I am deep underwater.

Lady's holidays keeps me away from the mat, maybe that is not helping, or who knows what helps.

9 comments:

  1. SkippettyMay 6, 2010 at 1:30 PM

    My thoughts are with you. My guy is going through a similar experience as you, having lost his father a couple months ago. I can only empathize with how deep your grief runs. Big hugs, Claudia. xxx

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  2. AnonymousMay 6, 2010 at 3:14 PM

    Un abrazote Clau, mandándote much energía. LOVE U.

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  3. ClaudiaMay 6, 2010 at 3:15 PM

    Skippetty, that is true, your guy is right there too... I hope it gets easier... thanks for the hugs

    Gracias Nat, love you too :-)

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  4. urbanashtangiMay 6, 2010 at 4:33 PM

    Strength to you my friend! love love love you!

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  5. maepressMay 7, 2010 at 6:13 AM

    All emotions are useful. One day at a time. So sorry for your loss, I hope that you find peace.

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  6. ClaudiaMay 7, 2010 at 8:59 AM

    thank you urbanashtangi.

    Maepress, yes, all emotions are important, you are quite right, it is my hope that by allowing them to be, to express themselves, eventually they will free me, they will pass... thank you for your message

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  7. BoodibaMay 7, 2010 at 9:14 AM

    I would say you are approaching things wisely. As long as you don't try to repress the natural progression of your feelings, you'll be ok. You'll get through the worst of the pain gradually. It takes time!

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  8. greentinaMay 7, 2010 at 11:43 AM

    We love you Clau, and send you some very warm sunrays from around here.
    I did practice today again, and thought about you.
    At + Mx + Mr + Me

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  9. ClaudiaMay 8, 2010 at 6:16 AM

    Hola Tina, que bueno que practicastes!!! me pone contenta y no se bien ni porque, pero me alegra... besos a todos y gracias por los rayos de luz :-) I miss you guys

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