At the height of my busy-ness in the dreaded stressed-out grey shades of Midtown New York City's corporate world I was completely burned out. I dreaded the thought of any extra responsibilities. I was a department of one to a growing office of over 300. I shouldn't have been like that, I had a job, it was a good job, but I knew yoga was my path and I was getting impatient.
It was in one of those days that a meeting came around where someone within the department suggested I do something that would have meant an immediate doubling of my work-load.
I stared at the wall in disbelief. My mind in verbal diarrhea saying that he "should have known better" and that "it was unfair" and "I wanted to die". And so on. Non stop.
For some reason the yoga I had in me (so far) magically worked and I was able to "shut up and just feel what I was feeling". To stay there in silence. To Be the space. To BE. Just as it was.
The silence must have been no longer than 20 seconds, maybe even 15.
After that pause, and right about when it became uncomfortable I heard another manager, one whom I thought hated me, say that it was not possible. He listed very valid arguments why the idea was not viable, it would not work. I was off the hook, I did not have to "do" anything, all I did was not-resist. All I did was BE.
Be the space is something we hear a lot of in yoga circles and it simply means "let things be before rushing to name it", accept things as they come, let them be.
Be the space means be the "observer", the one behind the curtain that resist nothing and wants nothing. Even if we are dying with feelings of dread inside. Those are feelings and it is OK to respect without suppressing. But can we not-judge? Let the feelings exist? Be the space for whatever is coming up in this moment?
It was inner space to the point of social awkwardness that showed me a new way to approach the situation. While deeply into the "feeling sorry for myself" I was not even able to look at the problem as objectively as this other manager did. I was not even able to see things for what they were.
This might not always work, but given a chance, the miracle of how many times it actually will work might blow your mind.
It was in one of those days that a meeting came around where someone within the department suggested I do something that would have meant an immediate doubling of my work-load.
I stared at the wall in disbelief. My mind in verbal diarrhea saying that he "should have known better" and that "it was unfair" and "I wanted to die". And so on. Non stop.
For some reason the yoga I had in me (so far) magically worked and I was able to "shut up and just feel what I was feeling". To stay there in silence. To Be the space. To BE. Just as it was.
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| Being the space |
After that pause, and right about when it became uncomfortable I heard another manager, one whom I thought hated me, say that it was not possible. He listed very valid arguments why the idea was not viable, it would not work. I was off the hook, I did not have to "do" anything, all I did was not-resist. All I did was BE.
Be the space is something we hear a lot of in yoga circles and it simply means "let things be before rushing to name it", accept things as they come, let them be.
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| We are here |
It was inner space to the point of social awkwardness that showed me a new way to approach the situation. While deeply into the "feeling sorry for myself" I was not even able to look at the problem as objectively as this other manager did. I was not even able to see things for what they were.
This might not always work, but given a chance, the miracle of how many times it actually will work might blow your mind.
I really liked this! 'Be the space' I'm borrowing it :-)
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